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Sunday, August 28, 2011

The 60 Hour Rule Before You Say "I Love You"

Hi Readers,

Ever been in love? True Love? But then, you were not sure, how and when to express the same. You saw the sparks flying all around! But you could not dare to ignite the Fire! Now if it is then let me tell you a story!

A very long time ago Romeo was roaming around dishevelled in search of Juliet. He was in desperation and was on the verge of exhaustion and could collapse any moment! Then he saw a very serene and calm looking person walking towards him. The person was dressed like a monk! The person approached him and asked whether Romeo needed any help. Romeo told him his story. The Monk told that he is the Monk who had not Sold but had Donated his Ferrari! Romeo was impressed and asked for his advice. The Monk told that, "Sorry Son, your love is already beyond control, not even God can help you out! But I will give some Gyan(Hindi-Knowledge) for the future generations. So listen with full attention."

Do you understand love? Or do you just love a person and therefore understand the relationship with that person!

Gyan Point: Loving a person is altogether a different thing than loving to love! 

When you fall in love with a person, you try your best to spend quality time with her/him. You talk with full consciousness and try your best to present yourself in a good light. You want to be a pleasant part of her/his life. You are jealous of others who are a better part of that person's life. You loath her/his absence. You sulk and get irritated when that person does not show up or does not respond in a expected or loving manner. Is this love? For most of us, it is!

A moment comes when you know that you are in love and now are at a crossroad of life when some decisions are to be made. At this stage some of you are in two kinds of dilemma:
  1. One, that the other person MAY also be in love but not sure whether she/he is ready for the commitment which you are in for.
  2. Second, that you are not at all sure of the love of the other person but want to take a chance by letting her/him know and then see what happens next!
Gyan Point: To be just in silent one-sided love and to be ready for a committed love has the same differences, which, having a thought in one's mind and executing that thought into a successful action has! Until the idea is put forth it does not make an iota of a difference anywhere!!

So, Romeo where were we? Ah yes, discussing on the resolution of the dilemma, when to confess your love. See, Romeo, we all want love of others around us! Some of that we get from our Parents, Siblings, Elders on the virtue of a blood-relation and some we want to create on the virtue of physical/mental attraction, a need of companionship and feelings of having a friend around. When we establish a relationship ourselves, what is kept in mind? That we understand each other, minute subtleties of the other and whether the other satisfies the need of the relation(friend/companion) we get into. Nobody gets into a relation if there is nothing to seek in it. What is in it for me? The things can be abstract like love, joy, happiness, cheerfulness, like-mindedness, a confidant or can be material like money, social status, education. All these requires a time frame to attain. And that is a 60 Hour time-frame where you and the other person has already spent enough quality time taking note of each others attributes, habits, quirks, nature, behaviour and mental match.

These 60 Hours may be attained in a rapid and quick way if there are immediate opportunities present in abundant for sharing through personal interactions, telephonic conversations and written correspondence. The same may be achieved over a time-scale of a few months to a few years if there were no abundant opportunities of communication available coupled with numerous gaps in communication due to various reasons like, staying in different geographical locations.

So Romeo, I know you have spent a life time with Juliet, but if you would have confessed your love after a break-point of 60 Hours of your relationship, things might have not gone worse as they are now! Because, just after those 60 hours, one is at the crossroad where a delicate balance still exists from where one can return back to normalcy instead of sinking deep into the quagmire of one sided or rejected/failed love.

Romeo collapsed and died a dreadful and painful death!

Happy Loving!!

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