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Sunday, May 29, 2011

DOWRY = Death Of Wedding Responsible You

Hi Readers,

We are living in times, where we are staying in the midst of social criminals! Unity in diversity! The crimes are such which are not only sponsored but also promoted by criminals and greedy minds in the name of tradition. A person, once a victim burns in violation of his dignity and sets out for the revenge. One such crime committed is the malpractice of Dowry in India.

India, a country which boasts of its colourful tradition and culture, is mired with heinous and malicious social practices which amount to destruction of human lives, particularly females. The practice of Dowry amounts to:
  • Female foeticide,
  • Domestic violence and
  • Merciless physical torture and cold blooded murder of newly wed brides, every day.


Shocking, right? But, did not we know this from a long time as it was taught to all of us in schools and shown in the Mass media? So, we ask, why a child who grows old to be a fine Man or Woman, keeps mum and becomes an accomplice to the crime of Dowry at the time of its own Marriage and of its relatives, friends and acquaintances? Does the child observes a contradiction in the content of texts and the social acts in his surroundings and therefore is confused. Absolutely not - no it cannot be! The practice of demanding a sum of money, property and favours as a prerequisite for the final acceptance of a Marriage proposal by the Groom's family must not look like a natural and well matured tradition, one will cherish and boast about! Does the concept of Marriage sounds like a endowment plan for the greedy and criminal minds? I fear not so!


Dowry started as a traditional practice of exchanging gifts and baubles as a mark of the formation of a new bond between two families. Then slowly, it was twisted and distorted to fulfil the ever increasing greed of the families. The balance turned against the Bride's family as after Marriage, the bride is supposed to stay with the Groom's family and therefore the quantity and importance of Dowry was skewed against them. Malicious reasoning were developed and embedded in the minds of the Society members. From then on, Dowry developed as Social Malpractice and a Poison for the Female generation.

So, you must be thinking, aah, this happens only to the uneducated and the folks at remote villages where people still believe in such stuff. I am very sorry, but the facts show a complete reversal in reality. The most horrendous and monstrous acts of bride's torture leading to murder and cases of domestic violence are registered against the folks who have the highest of degrees and the widest of education. The education imparted has failed to evoke an iota of human values and the courage to go against the malpractice of Dowry. Dowry is now one of the most widespread crime which dictates the atrocities on woman in particular.

Dowry in most parts of India is still discussed as a subject of boast and pride by the Groom's family (disgusting!) and at the same time as a subject of worry and fear by the Bride's family. I have been a part of many a conversations where I have heard the men of this generation, the generation which boasts of technological advancements and High education, discussing the the matter of Dowry with a laugh and were thrilled and enjoyed the prospects of getting various degrees of wealth from the alliances in discussion. I was horrified! I was in disgust! I was shocked! I almost choked! Is this the same India which plans to be a Super-power in 2020. I do not think so with this ideology and mindset.

When a beautiful and cute little baby is born, and then, it is revealed to the parents and the extended family that it is a princess, a goddess, who is born to them, the malpractices like Dowry existing in the society, they are in, turns this boon to a bane. Its a shame on such a society!

There are about 3000 marriages taking place every day in India and it increases to 15000 in the peak seasons depending upon the availability of resources and auspicious days all round the year. In India, the scale of celebration on the days of the Marriage takes higher priority than the Marriage itself. More emphasis is given on the festivities of the event than the event itself. I have visited many a Marriages, where I have seldom found the families involved including the bride and groom to be content, at ease and enjoying themselves. There is chaos, pomp and show everywhere. Snobby folks are heard complaining of the so called shortcomings in the arrangements. I have always felt that the Marriage as a event has been disarrayed and disfigured beyond the scope of enjoyment and as a event of fun and frolic. As the Marriage is projected as a show of pomp and stature of families involved which at most of the times is out of place and capacity, any matter related to it, such as Dowry, takes a bow in front of other things and the Bride's family has to budge.

One must wonder, if Dowry is such an awful practice then why do not the hot-shots and the people with minds in the right place, speaking up against it! Let me tell you why!! Its really simple. Lets suppose, a crime is committed. Now in the crime one's family members are involved, maybe one's own brother, a cousin, their parents. Do you think, one will be able to say anything in this matter now. One will keep quite and rather develop an ideology to feel comfortable after witnessing this crime. The event of Marriage happens in every family, rich or poor, educated or uneducated, blue collar or white collar folks. It is omnipresent. In this crime one's own are involved making it a very emotional and personal instance where one chooses to remain silent rather that uttering a single word in protest. Also Greed is Good, as Gekko Gordon has said. Who does not like money. Show me one! So the problem is very difficult to erase due to a full support from the Society members to let this crime continue with its fangs stretched out and sharp enough to continue killing more female foetus and brides in the future.

Taking Dowry as an example, I fear for the future of India and her daughters!

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